I dislike the intenseness with which my emotions are changing. I feel sometimes like I am drowning. Amazing is it not that anger and sadness can be maintained within the same brain at one time and yet not seem to exist at all.
I dislike being angry.It is not the anger that clears the air. This is an anger that corrupts your very being and turns you into a shrieking, slobbering shrew. One of the women you see in the horror movies that turns into a killer.
I dislike the way my hair is laying on my head.
I dislike the color of my foundation.
I dislike the way that the pills that I took to make me sleep makes my head feel.
I dislike the fact that I dislike so many things. Believe me this list is short and
I do not want to dislike the the things that I dislike.
I want to like the things that I dislike because I did not always dislike these things.I want to like myself again. I want to look into my mirror and like what I see. I have not liked what I see there for years. Even at 38 I have been told I am attractive. I do not see it. I see me. I see someone I do not like.
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